The Airtran Attempt Post

So I am trying really hard to like AirTran. Primarily because Sarah always has nothing but delightful experiences on the airline, but also because United pretty much sucks (that includes you too Ted) and everyone else’s prices are too high. However despite my attempts to appreciate the airline I am constantly getting shot down by them. This weekend was a perfect example. The flight I booked apparently didn’t guarantee me a seat on said flight. Merely I was guaranteed a ‘reservation’. What the hell that means I don’t know but apparently its worth $300. I get to the gate and ask for a seat (pretty please) and find that its oversold by 15 seats. The only way I can guarantee a seat is to hope 15 people forget to go to the airport or upgrade to first class. Fortunately due to the situation they where offering the last two first class seats for a nice $60 upgrade. Being that the upgrade usually costs $200 bucks I decided to take up the offer. That and I saw a large group of 14 year old foreigners on a youth group trip all waiting in line for the same flight and I wanted NOTHING to do with them*.

So anyway after getting on board we are stuck waiting 45 min while a crew comes in and tries to fix a cockpit malfunction. The captain comes on every fifteen minutes or so to ensure us that they are trying the ‘quickest fix possible’ which is hardly reassuring. After a wait, we taxi and head to the runway. Only to turn around and go right back to the gate. “We don’t feel comfortable taking of with this nagging issue that we thought we had resolved” is the captains response. Back on come the techs. Sitting up front I was able to see and hear everything that was going on in the cockpit, and the confused faces and seemingly random ‘lets try this one and see’ approach to the knobs and buttons hardly made me confident. After half an hour they decide they need to reboot the plane (you can do that!?!?) which meant all laughs, air and communications went dead. We where stick in the dark for two hours before everything came back to life and we where able to take off. Come on Airtran…I wanna be friends. Why won’t you let me in? Why you gotta always be like this?

*Why the hell do those groups wear matching colored t-shirts? You can’t shut the damn kids up for 30 seconds. There is no way you are going to misplace any of them. And if by some strange reason that happens: good for you. Get on the plane.

The US Airways Post

Airtran has just been replaced as my least favorite domestic airline. US Airways is the new champ of sucky aviation. I had never flown with them before (I’m a United man myself) and probably never will again if it’s up to me. This time was the result of a last minute attempt at securing tickets with Expeidia. So after my very merry holiday with the family I headed to the airport ready to go, and found that one of my connecting flights had been delayed. Firstly, who needs a connecting flight down to Florida? Its 2 hours away. Strike one. Strike two would be that the connection was delayed to the point where I’d not make the second leg of my trip and needed to reschedule my itinerary. Strikes Three through Six would be that; all flights out of Dulles are booked full (3), all flights tomorrow out of Dulles are booked full (4), the only flight she can get me on is at Regan Airport (5), and that the Regan flight leaves tomorrow morning and I’ll have to catch a cab first thing to catch the flight (6). Admittedly the Regan flight was direct, and they paid for my cab, but just when I was about to lift Strike 6 from the record, they oversold the flight and needed five volunteers to abdicate their seats before the damn thing could take off. Normally I would have volunteered, because a free roundtrip ticket is pretty tempting and I was already missing work that day as is. But the next available flight wasn’t until 7pm the following day. So too bad.

Eventually 5 suckers…err.. model citizens came forward and we took off 45 minutes late*. While the flight itself was better than Airtran (boo, hissss) all the drama and preboarding issues left a sour taste in my mouth. Plus they don’t give you snacks for free on the flight. They offer to sell you a five dollar “Snack Pack” as they march up and down the isle. Also, they did an in-flight announcement to try sell you on a credit card and proceeded to come down and ask every passenger (that wasn’t faking sleep) to fill out an application. With flight prices the way they are now, I find it crazy that this is the route the airline is taking. Cheapens everything.

Moral of the story: Don’t leave Christmas flight booking till Thanksgiving.
Bonus Moral: US Airways sucks.

*Strike 7. You’re out! I love baseball.